What adulthood doesn’t tell you about having fun

What adulthood doesn’t tell you about having fun

(RA2Studio/Shutterstock)


Save Story
Leer en español

Estimated read time: 4-5 minutes

This archived news story is available only for your personal, non-commercial use. Information in the story may be outdated or superseded by additional information. Reading or replaying the story in its archived form does not constitute a republication of the story.

SALT LAKE CITY — Everywhere I go I see reminders of the things I need to get done. Piles of laundry waiting to get folded taunt me as I walk by. At the same time, my phone buzzes in my pocket — it’s another email in my inbox begging for my attention. Soon, dinner will be a dance of perfect timing or else hungry tummies leave for dance and soccer.

I’m tired. I feel behind. And I want to quit — or at the very least be somewhere else, doing something else. I hate that productivity becomes the barometer for a good day.

While waiting in my minivan to begin the after-school carpool, I take a minute and scroll through Instagram. I see someone wearing a black t-shirt that says in white block letters exactly how I feel: I Can’t Adult Today.

As adults we often feel this obligation to be serious and responsible. Between our family, home and professional responsibilities, there is no time to play. We feel we must “adult” — until we break and just can’t “adult” any more.

But having fun and playing regularly is just as important for us as it is for our children. Deep down we know this. Experience and experts explain just how important saving space for play is in our own life.

But these are the things adulthood doesn’t want you to know about having fun.

Playing is necessary for you — and your brain

Dr. Stuart Brown is a pioneer in research on play. In a TED Talk he gave in 2008 titled “Play is more than just fun,” Brown asks, “What does play do for the brain? Well, a lot. … Nothing lights up the brain like play.”

No matter how old we get, research shows play can cultivate or rekindle relationships, spark creative thinking and improve problem solving, even help with healing.

Related

We never grow out of playing. Scott G. Eberle, Ph.D, vice president for play studies at The Strong simply puts it, “We don’t lose the need for novelty and pleasure as we grow up.”

If you don’t play, there will be consequences

Brown, who has spent decades studying the power of play from professionals to prisoners, says, if we don't play, there are serious consequences.

"What you begin to see when there's major play deprivation in an otherwise competent adult is that they're not much fun to be around," he said. "You begin to see that the perseverance and joy in work is lessened and that life is much more laborious."

And on a more serious note, Brown found that lack of play was just as important as other factors in predicting criminal behavior among murderers in Texas prisons.

The opposite of play is not work

In his TED Talk, Brown stated, “The opposite of play is not work — it’s depression. ... Try imagining a world without play.”

If you took all the things from your life that were fun for you, you would have nothing left to look forward to.

Surround yourself with playful people

Adulthood might have you believing responsibility is important all the time. But we can still select friends who are playful, who make us laugh until our abs ache. Playing in groups increases relationships and builds a sense of community.

Play with your little ones. Playing with our kids encourages our imagination and builds memories with our family.

It’s important to redefine what play is for you

In an interview with NPR, Brown said, "Play is something done for its own sake. It's voluntary, it's pleasurable, it offers a sense of engagement, it takes you out of time. And the act itself is more important than the outcome."

When you play, you find joy and pleasure. You are rejuvenated. Make a play list — write down the things you do for fun. What activities constitute play for you? What are the things you do that cause you to lose track of time?

Play often

Remind yourself that play time is not wasted time. Make sure you play often. Create time in your day or week to enjoy life and the people who live in your life with you.

Albert Einstein said, “Play is the highest form of research.” And that goes for adults, too.


Nicole Carpenter is CEO of MOMentity.com and creator of the Define Your Time time-management program. She is a speaker and bestselling author of "52 Weeks to Fortify Your Family." Nicole and her husband are raising four kids in Syracuse, Utah.

Related links

Most recent Family stories

Related topics

Family

STAY IN THE KNOW

Get informative articles and interesting stories delivered to your inbox weekly. Subscribe to the KSL.com Trending 5.
By subscribing, you acknowledge and agree to KSL.com's Terms of Use and Privacy Policy.

KSL Weather Forecast